Henry VIII is reading correspondence whilst the Groom of the Stool busies himself.
There is a knock at the door.
Henry: "Enter".
Enter Cardinal Wolsey, obviously in a state of high excitement.
Wolsey: "Majesty, I bring you great news!"
Henry: "Catherine has agreed a divorce?"
W: "Not yet, Majesty. The news concerns my Blog"
H: "Oh that waste of the Lord's day. What of it?"
W: "It has been recognised by Professor Luker and is in His List"
H (suspicious): "Did you say Luther?"
W:"No Sire, Professor Luker of the house of Cliopatria in the New World"
H: "What of this List?"
W: "It contains a choice selection of eighty Historical Blogs, and can only bring further esteem for your reign and reputation".
H:"Are the French represented?"
W: "I do not think so".
H (looking pleased):"Hmm. And Spain?"
W:"Again they seem absent. I am sure you will not object to the presence of the Classics, and the East?
Henry:"I suppose not. But make sure all your posts, from now on, mention myself and are written in courtly style. Now go and sort out my Great Matter. "
Wolsey (withdrawing):"Of course, Sire."
Henry: "And ensure that this List is proclaimed throughout the Land"
Wolsey: "I'm right on it".
Here it is, subjects:
Your... your eminence? Uh, that is.. your eminence, something terrible has happened.
ReplyDeleteI mean, really effing terrible.
This exchange between you and the King, and the dramatization of it that has just occurred in my head, have revealed the following terror: I can no longer picture your eminentosity, nor His Majesty, except... except as, gulp, Sam Neill and Jonathan Rhys Meyers.
Forgive me, your eminence.
::Scurries off to burn contemporary portraits onto retinas::
(And congrats!)
Neophyte,
ReplyDeleteThis is a common condition brought about by exposure to salacious mini-series.
I will consult the court alchemist for a suitable purgative!